Ever since our nation developed an insatiable sweet-tooth, candy companies have been conjuring delectable confections to help ease the pain inflicted upon our taste buds by broccoli, vitamins, and fluoridated water. Noted chocolateer and midget-collector Willy Wonka put it best: We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of the dreams. Looking back at American candy history, our collective dream was to create the most delicious food ever conceivable no matter what the cost. Simply put, the only thing stopping from achieving our candied-goals is our own imaginations. And, to a lesser extent, obesity, Type I diabetes and tooth-decay.
Which is why a dream was hatched in a small chocolating laboratory in 1928 which eschewed the notion of moderation and attempted to create the gooiest, chocolatiest, milkiest, most caramel-infused concoction to sell to the hungry public. Unfortunately, something went horribly awry in the process. This unexpected turn of events led to a most serendipitous discovery, and out came what later would be known as a "Milk Dud"--a slightly lop-sided chocolate piece filled with a creamy, caramel center.
Despite having a self-deprecating name, Milk Dud's are known for their delicious, chewy quality, addictive aftertaste, and the ability for movie patrons to absentmindedly devour an entire Jumbo box before the previews have rolled. While some complain of the occasional difficulty chewing through the complexly sweet texture, most able-bodied and normally-jawed diners find no trouble in navigating the sweet, tongue-rolling journey that awaits ahead of them. Since their acquisition by Leaf and subsequent buyout by Hershey's, Milk Dud's have seen virtually no advertising campaign-- word of mouth and their inherently scrumptious qualities are all that have carried Milk Duds through times of war, economic uncertainty, and slanderous public health campaigns. Hardly the same can be said for other name-brand candies.
Although some like to badmouth Milk Duds, perhaps their naysaying masks a deep-seeded fear of trying such new, challenging and exciting things; maybe eating grass and pizza all day as a child has had such a dizzying effect on the palate that genuinely good food tastes bad to them? Until further scientific and empirical inquiry is made into their psychological profile, past eating habits, and aversion to and fear of excitement, it is best to ignore their critical assessment and wait until they mature into responsible, candy-loving connoisseurs like the rest of us.
Do yourself a favor: try a Milk Dud. Savor its buttery richness. Let its full-bodied flavor develop in your mouth before chewing. Allow its milky-cocoa bodice plunge down your throat into your happy tummy. The try another, you wont regret it.
Addenda: It is not recommended feeding Milk Duds to animals, as they are prone to want nothing more for their supper than a delicious, crystalline bowl filled to the brim. Also, If you wish to purchase Milk Duds from Amazon.com, let it be noted that they are found in the "Gourmet" section of the site. Let it further be noted that if you do an online image search for Milk Duds and children are present that it is also a euphemism for a females mammaries, which will return many inappropriate/unfunny pictures either a)juxtaposing a buxom young woman next to a box or b)simply pointing at breasts and calling them milk duds. Milk Duds, the Leaf Corporation, the Hershey's Corporation, and F. Hoffman & Co., the originator of the Duds, do not endorse the use of their product in such facile and prurient ways, nor do they endorse the facts or history presented by this writing.
Despite having a self-deprecating name, Milk Dud's are known for their delicious, chewy quality, addictive aftertaste, and the ability for movie patrons to absentmindedly devour an entire Jumbo box before the previews have rolled. While some complain of the occasional difficulty chewing through the complexly sweet texture, most able-bodied and normally-jawed diners find no trouble in navigating the sweet, tongue-rolling journey that awaits ahead of them. Since their acquisition by Leaf and subsequent buyout by Hershey's, Milk Dud's have seen virtually no advertising campaign-- word of mouth and their inherently scrumptious qualities are all that have carried Milk Duds through times of war, economic uncertainty, and slanderous public health campaigns. Hardly the same can be said for other name-brand candies.
Although some like to badmouth Milk Duds, perhaps their naysaying masks a deep-seeded fear of trying such new, challenging and exciting things; maybe eating grass and pizza all day as a child has had such a dizzying effect on the palate that genuinely good food tastes bad to them? Until further scientific and empirical inquiry is made into their psychological profile, past eating habits, and aversion to and fear of excitement, it is best to ignore their critical assessment and wait until they mature into responsible, candy-loving connoisseurs like the rest of us.
Do yourself a favor: try a Milk Dud. Savor its buttery richness. Let its full-bodied flavor develop in your mouth before chewing. Allow its milky-cocoa bodice plunge down your throat into your happy tummy. The try another, you wont regret it.
Addenda: It is not recommended feeding Milk Duds to animals, as they are prone to want nothing more for their supper than a delicious, crystalline bowl filled to the brim. Also, If you wish to purchase Milk Duds from Amazon.com, let it be noted that they are found in the "Gourmet" section of the site. Let it further be noted that if you do an online image search for Milk Duds and children are present that it is also a euphemism for a females mammaries, which will return many inappropriate/unfunny pictures either a)juxtaposing a buxom young woman next to a box or b)simply pointing at breasts and calling them milk duds. Milk Duds, the Leaf Corporation, the Hershey's Corporation, and F. Hoffman & Co., the originator of the Duds, do not endorse the use of their product in such facile and prurient ways, nor do they endorse the facts or history presented by this writing.
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