Get swept up in The Bug mania

I don't know why, but I get excited every time a music video employs large speakers as weapons of pacifistic resistance. I also get very excited when sexy, militantly-dressed dancers are digitized and pixel-warped to dubstep beats. Look:

Radiohead: Auburn, Washington

Image Courtesy of Stephane

Radiohead are one of those artists that have achieved such a pinnacle of critical and commercial success, it is difficult to not attend their concerts without the highest of expectations. The atmosphere of the White River Ampitheater was thick with this expectation, as well, as this was their only appearance in the Northwest, and many attendees including myself had made quite a trek to see the diminuitive Thom Yorke and his merry band perform.

The opening act Liars, creators of my favorite album of 2006 Drum's Not Dead and the critically-acclaimed self-titled follow-up album, took the stage early with about a tenth of the venue's capacity filled. Despite the lack of audience present, they delivered a swift and energetic set, performing tracks mostly off of Drum and earlier albums. They closed out their set with a raucous version of "Plaster Casts of Everything", which amped up the slowly filling-in crowd for the headliners for the evening.

Radiohead took the stage around 9 p.m., just as the sun was fading over the horizon, backed by a hi-tech luminescent display of light-ropes and video monitors. As predicted by my friend, they launched with the opening track, 15 step, from In Rainbows, which immediately got the entire crowd to their feet. As the concert continued, they covered the entire Rainbows album, oddly with the exception of their latest single "House of Cards", and much of the rest of their pantheon. As the evening went on and people layered and zipped-up for intermittent rain, Yorke made subdued small-talk with the audience and, at one point, requested to shine a light on all of those huddled far out in lawn seating.

Even though it was a quintessential Northwest night, by no means were the performance or presentation chilly and gray. For those of us barely able to make out the bobble-headed Yorke, the light-and-video show were the real performers, certainly setting a very high standard for the future of concert visuals. Each song had a distinct tone and color-scheme, transitioning from warm oranges to icy blues to rich pinks. The large video displays flanking the stage and behind the band added a very exciting texture to the performance, as well; featuring a professional-appearing and intensly remixed visual medley of the livc show, it will be little surprise if what we saw on screen makes it into a live DVD or music video.

After coming out for a second encore, Radiohead left the stage with a droning analog signal and the word "Everything" rapidly scanning across the light-ropes. For most fans, this is an apt conclusion to a show by one of the biggest and best bands of the new century: a sense of foreboding and a call of responsibility to our generation.

Blog War: Cut-Offs

Cut-offs, despite having a slightly negative sounding name like these guys , are the greatest reusable fashion statement to come along since thrift-store clothing. Cut-offs can be sexy, natty, or casual, and completely alterable to any of these styles simply with the provision of a cutting object. Although, for some, creating them may seem like a complicated and stressful task, one can create a pair with little more than:

1) An unwanted pair of jeans (or slacks) in need of repurposing

2) Scissors (krinkle-kut for maximum style points)

Also helpful are a bottle of malt-liquor for the courage to eviscerate a pair of pants beyond repair; a surveyor's level to ensure maximum evenness; a slightly self-destructive sentiment; and a box of milk duds for chewing pleasure. With these possessions and the right amount of determination, one can create a work of denim art.

The beauty of cut-offs lie not only in their aesthetics, but in the pure creative control afforded to the wearer: you are the designer, tailor, and, ultimately, the consumer. Some people, however, may pooh-pooh cut-offs for these exact reasons; they are afraid of their own taste in fashion and do not have the self-confidence to take the risk and wish for someone else, like a big denim corporation, to tell them what the appropriate length and style is. It is understandable that these naysayers don't like cut-offs, however, because they are in all likelihood at a very difficult stage in their life where they are not sure whether to dress hip and sexy or aspire to the fashions of this chick.

At other times, you may encounter people who are so anti cut-offs they may request you change out of them because they have a frayed hemline, look unprofessional, and are scaring away customers from your computer store. A quick fix would be to simply roll-up or staple the cuffs of your cut-offs. But, an even quicker solution would be to altogether ignore the anti cut-off person and glaring customers, finish your online crossword, and give your 2-week-notice immediately. This way, you will not be selling out your values of reusability and sustainability, and you will be also have a reason to leave a job you secretly loathe.

Cut-offs are an affordable, fashionable, and creative way to express yourself in a pants-less style. Some may tell you capris or cargo shorts are the way to go for the summer; if only they knew the ease and satisfaction of creating a pair of cut-offs, we may one day live in a truly pants-free and fashion-sustainable society.

Blog War: Milk Duds

Ever since our nation developed an insatiable sweet-tooth, candy companies have been conjuring delectable confections to help ease the pain inflicted upon our taste buds by broccoli, vitamins, and fluoridated water. Noted chocolateer and midget-collector Willy Wonka put it best: We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of the dreams. Looking back at American candy history, our collective dream was to create the most delicious food ever conceivable no matter what the cost. Simply put, the only thing stopping from achieving our candied-goals is our own imaginations. And, to a lesser extent, obesity, Type I diabetes and tooth-decay.

Which is why a dream was hatched in a small chocolating laboratory in 1928 which eschewed the notion of moderation and attempted to create the gooiest, chocolatiest, milkiest, most caramel-infused concoction to sell to the hungry public. Unfortunately, something went horribly awry in the process. This unexpected turn of events led to a most serendipitous discovery, and out came what later would be known as a "Milk Dud"--a slightly lop-sided chocolate piece filled with a creamy, caramel center.

Despite having a self-deprecating name, Milk Dud's are known for their delicious, chewy quality, addictive aftertaste, and the ability for movie patrons to absentmindedly devour an entire Jumbo box before the previews have rolled. While some complain of the occasional difficulty chewing through the complexly sweet texture, most able-bodied and normally-jawed diners find no trouble in navigating the sweet, tongue-rolling journey that awaits ahead of them. Since their acquisition by Leaf and subsequent buyout by Hershey's, Milk Dud's have seen virtually no advertising campaign-- word of mouth and their inherently scrumptious qualities are all that have carried Milk Duds through times of war, economic uncertainty, and slanderous public health campaigns. Hardly the same can be said for other name-brand candies.

Although some like to badmouth Milk Duds, perhaps their naysaying masks a deep-seeded fear of trying such new, challenging and exciting things; maybe eating grass and pizza all day as a child has had such a dizzying effect on the palate that genuinely good food tastes bad to them? Until further scientific and empirical inquiry is made into their psychological profile, past eating habits, and aversion to and fear of excitement, it is best to ignore their critical assessment and wait until they mature into responsible, candy-loving connoisseurs like the rest of us.

Do yourself a favor: try a Milk Dud. Savor its buttery richness. Let its full-bodied flavor develop in your mouth before chewing. Allow its milky-cocoa bodice plunge down your throat into your happy tummy. The try another, you wont regret it.


Addenda: It is not recommended feeding Milk Duds to animals, as they are prone to want nothing more for their supper than a delicious, crystalline bowl filled to the brim. Also, If you wish to purchase Milk Duds from Amazon.com, let it be noted that they are found in the "Gourmet" section of the site. Let it further be noted that if you do an online image search for Milk Duds and children are present that it is also a euphemism for a females mammaries, which will return many inappropriate/unfunny pictures either a)juxtaposing a buxom young woman next to a box or b)simply pointing at breasts and calling them milk duds. Milk Duds, the Leaf Corporation, the Hershey's Corporation, and F. Hoffman & Co., the originator of the Duds, do not endorse the use of their product in such facile and prurient ways, nor do they endorse the facts or history presented by this writing.